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People Inspired and Devastated Alike, Hatch Up Donald Trump-Inspired Inauguration Day Drinking Games

Read the label closely on this bottled up thread of booze-minded, politically-fueled goodness: many of these games are guaranteed to give your tolerance for the alcohol a solid run, all the while pulverizing your liver. And hey, maybe that's exactly what some of us find ourselves hopelessly looking for as we stare out at the abyss of what some might call the 'death of the American Dream', while others see hope and promise. I don't know. Let's hoist a glass either way and enjoy the circus.

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Site Specifically Tailored for Single Trump Supporters Wants to Make Dating Great Again

Just when I thought I'd seen it all with dating apps, this shit comes to fruition: a dating service intended for likeminded, single Trump supporters ready to swipe right on making dating great again. At least we've a venue that can act as a beacon for the lost, single souls out there bonded through their shared respect, potential adoration for the tangerine-skinned, golden-haired Prez Elect---DJ Trump. "What are your thoughts on the Wall?" Solid conversation starter material right there.

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Specifically, Colbert dives in on a little rant about how he thinks that Trump thinks Presidents get the weekends off--or least that big celebration that'll follow Inauguration Day on Friday. 

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As Inauguration Day looms heavy on the horizon (this Friday), and Trump's Twitter game only seems to ramp up in its unpresidented ridiculousness, it's only right that we have someone like the Jimmy Kimmel take to the streets to interview the citizenry, and hold a microscope up over something remotely similar to a Bubonic Plague of Ignorance. Oh a quick by the way here: this madness happened before:



Yes, in case anyone out there is watching this video wondering to themselves what the hell the big deal is with these answers...it's this: they are the same damn thing. The Affordable Care Act, and Obamacare = The same. Could we at least have had one person answer correctly. Nah dawg, we gotta stir the pot of stress-ridden hysteria on a regular basis.

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Donald Trump Accidentally Tweets at the Wrong Ivanka Trump, Ends Up Inviting Hilarious String of Responses From Her and Band of Twitter Trolls

Part of me right now is harboring the gut kind of instinct that the Donald had to have knowingly stirred the pot of chaos on this one. I mean dude, not only is this the wrong Ivanka, but she's evidently an outspoken environmentalist. See for yourself with the tweet she decided to respond back with after DJ Trump's original botched attempt to touch base with the wifey on Twitter:

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Spencer Gift's Ignites Blind Rage from Tons of People for Selling Product That Many Consider Uuugely Inappropriate

Spencer Gift's done gone dived deep down the rabbit hole of politically-fueled controversy with their latest move here; and in a weird kind of way, it's almost impressive. Impressive that a store so widely hailed as a beacon of notoriously strange wardrobe items legit went and outdid themselves. So, feast your eyes on a social justice warrior's nightmare:

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If it wasn't so impressive, it would just be frightening.

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'Jimmy Kimmel Live' Writer Has Made It Her Life's Purpose to Stalk and Troll Donald Trump's Tweets

Some folks say the best way to remedy dark and troubling times is through laughter, and I'll be damned if this comedy writer isn't applying the philosophy to sweet perfection. Let's just say that yesterday's golden shower news gave her a lot of material to work with.

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Ben Carson Utters Unfortunate Phrasing During a Roasting From Elizabeth Warren

Today during his confirmation hearing for his appointment to Secretary of Housing and Urban Development retired neurosurgeon. Dr. Ben Carson, had an extremely unfortunate slip up.

While he was trying to dodge questions from Sen. Elizabeth Warren he had an very unfortunate choice of words.

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"At the risk of being a wet blanket, Stephen refuses to engage in any kind of yellow journalism, despite the torrent of PEOTUS stories flooding the country."

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From “the Closet Summit” to “Birdie Sanders,” the 2016 election was the never-ending nightmare that seems like it never ended. But it’s still worth a closer look, especially when Marco Rubio made allegations about not being able to trust people with small hands (among other things about small hands — man, 2016 really was awful).

Anyway, Seth Meyers recapped it all in his “Closer Look” segment. 12 months of horror in eight minutes of comedy. There are all those great things you forgot about, especially this:

via GIPHY 

and this: 

via Twitter

Maybe it wasn’t all bad. Wait, yes, it was.

 

amazon selling empty book why trump deserves trust respect and admiration
Via @jigokunt
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Can’t wait for the movie! 

The new book Why Trump Deserves Trust, Respect and Admiration by David King is for sale on Amazon.

By all accounts, it’s a real book. There’s a jacket, a spine, paper pages, etc. By all accounts David King is a real author. The cover even declares him a “political analyst.” By all accounts, the unaccredited review on the cover, which reads “‘Refreshingly honest’” underneath five stars, is a real review. It has to be real or else why would they put it there?

The information inside supports this argument. King’s latest treatise on that why reality-TV gameshow host who won the presidency last month deserves trust, respect, and admiration is completely empty, not a word in it. It’s filled with blank, empty pages. Any question? The book’s description clears up any questions:

 

“This book is full of blank pages. Despite years of research, we could not find anything to say on this subject, so please feel free to use this book for notes.”

 

Why Trump Deserves Trust, Respect and Admiration is on sale now for $7.99. It’s Prime ready and the page features this advertisement:

 

 

 

Does that mean Why Trump Deserves Trust, Respect and Admiration is one of the best books of 2016? Probably not, but it really makes you think. 

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Via dailymail
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Earlier today a man and his family were kicked off a plane for confronting Ivanka Trump (whether he did it calmly or violently seems to be a matter of who is telling the story). During the episode, the man's husband decided to live Tweet what was going on because ??? 

The Tweets, and as far as we can tell his Twitter account as well, have since been deleted but don't worry, the WHOLE internet still has screenshots. 

So here are the Tweets, and the image and Tweet above thanks to this guy named Matthew Lasner and the fact that nothing can be erased from the internet.