Ri Sol Ju

"MMM! Fry this up for my snack, general!" "Ummm... you DO realize that's just plastic?" "Yeah, whatever."

"Howdy y'all! Come and meet the little misses!" This happens every time he watches "Gunsmoke" reruns.

It was a dark and stormy night, when Miss Kim realized that no matter what, the man beside her would always resemble a North Korean Pilsbury Dough Boy with a really bad hair cut.

(Kim Jong-un, Ri Sol-ju)

Breaking News - Kim Jong Un and Ri Sol-ju, well fed and well dressed, applaud their starving nation's well funded military.

Everybody sing along! "Hey I just met you, and this is crazy, but here's my Communist Party membership card, so please don't report me to the govt."

this song is so bitchin'

(Ri Sol-Ju and Kim Jong-Un)

First foreign trip: Drug his rice wine, grab the credit cards, and run like hell

(Kim Jong-Un and Ri Sol-Ju)

Oh, joy! Sex at last! Oh, joy! Food at last!

(Ri Sol-Ju and Kim Jong-Un)

The North Korean news agency has confirmed that this lovely lady named "Ri Sol Ju," is Kim Jong-Un's new wife. I'm pretty sure it's safe to say that the newlyweds will be honeymooning in... Pyongyang.